Our Journey to homeschooling-Part 4

After a lot of brainstorming, praying, talking to my SIL, and finding out that a few of the kids friends from church (Awesome, well mannered, friendly kids) were homeschooled, I brought the subject of homeschooling up to DH again. This time I had proof that homeschooled kids weren't unsociable wierdos- He knew our niece wasn't a wierdo, nor the kids from church, not only were they not wierd they were some of the neatest kids we knew. He also knew that no matter what decision we made I was not budging on the fact that I would not send the kids back to that school.

I went to the library and checked out every book on homeschooling I could find. I read them all in a matter of a few weeks. I spoke to my SIL and my friend from church and bombarded them with questions. I presented all the info to DH and he was finally convinced that homeschooling wouldn't turn the kids in to wierdos who wore underwear on thier heads. (I later found out from SIL that they had known a rather odd family growing up that homeschooled, and after further discussion we all agreed that some people are wierd no matter where they go to school!)

In the end it was a family decision. Both the kids were excited about the idea. Although neither really knew what homeschooling really was other than they didn't have to go back to the public school. We decided to take it on a one year basis and view it as whether it worked out or not we would have gained a whole year with our kids.


I had reservations though. As much as I knew I was doing the right thing I dealt with guilt. Guilt that I would be unable to work full time at the family business as was formerly assumed since both the kids would be in school full time. DH was already having a hard time picking up the slack for me since I had been spending most of my time at the school rather than at work. I also worried that I wouldn't know enough to teach them, or that I wouldn't have the patience. I also wondered how I was going to do it all. I was already overcommited and over stressed.

Through out all my doubting myself and my worries and fears. I felt in my heart that I was doing what was best for our family and so our homeschooling journey begins...

Our Journey to homeschooling- Part 1

It took us a long time to come to the decision to homeschool. Before our kids were even old enough to go to school I had brought the subject up to hubby that I wanted to seriously consider homeschooling. Hubby was flat out against it. His reasons being that homeschooled kids were "wierd" and didn't know how to act around other kids (Socialization problems.) There was no discussing it with him at the time. time flew by and it became time for preschool. Being a first time parent I was concerned about doing everything right and preschool was on that unwritten "How to be a Perfect Mom and do everything right" list. We enrolled DS in the local Christian Preschool. To be honest, I spent most of my time loitering in the halls or sitting in the parking lot. I thought sending him to preschool was what I was supposed to do but I really felt in my heart he was to be young to be away from us and it seemed rather unneccesary. He didn't seem to be ready and didn't look forward to his time at school. On top of that I felt that everything he was learning were things I was capable of teaching him at home. So after a short two weeks we pulled him out of school and I began to work with him on the basics, letters, writing his name and such. (I later found out that the preschool teachers at that school were not certified teachers and were using a homeschool program in the classroom.)

It was soon time for kindergarten. The homeschooling subject was still dead in the water with hubby. I was really nervous to send him to school for many reasons, one of the top being that I had heard horror stories of the security in the school. (I graduated high school the same year as the Thurston High shooting which was/is 15 minutes from us) which affected me deeply and plays a roll in my lack of trust in the safety at school. Another top reason being that we had always heard that the school district here was horrible. (We moved here when the kids were babies and only intended on staying two years.... We ended up falling in love with the community and 10 years later and we are still here) Not knowing an alternative (or the fact that kids aren't even required by law to be registered as a schooler until age 7) I enrolled him in to the local public school.
I was not thrilled and spent a lot of time in his classroom. (Everyone kept telling me, "Just wait before long you will be so happy that he is off and you have some ME time" I kept waiting for that day to come. It never did. I know it sounds like I am totally crazy. Maybe I am. But I wanted to know what he was doing. What he was learning. He was exploring new things and I wanted to see what he liked and didn't like. He was only 5 and a young 5 at that. It still felt too soon for him to be gone for so long.
We did luck out and got an awesome teacher and she didn't seem to mind that I was crazy about my son. She welcomed me in the classroom and always kept me informed. DS liked school. He could live with out it, but he didn't cry about going and it was obvious he loved his teacher. He was having trouble in some areas though. He was very quiet and would stay to himself most of the time. He didn't interact with other kids much. By the middle of the year it came to my attention that he had major test anxiety. He went in to school knowing his ABC's, how to write his name, all the basic stuff. A few weeks in to school he was tested on these skills. I still remember the day his teacher called me in to talk about the test results. I was shocked at what I heard. According to her test he could only identify a few letters of the alphabet and a few sounds and could not write his name! I cried right there on the spot, I was confused. I knew he could do all of those things! I had taught him myself! I went home confused but remained vigilent on our after school work. I bought every phonix book out there and worked continuously with him afternoons and weekends.
It soon became time for the next semesters testing. Again his teacher called me in and gave me the same news. This time though, she knew for herself that he had mastered these skills as she had seen it in his daily work and he had been in school now for several months. It finally clicked for both of us that it was test anxiety. I instantly took the blame thinking that I had put too much pressure on him with the extra work we did at home. I quit working with him at home for the rest of the school year (other than our night reading time and his homework) thinking that it would help. Last test came around- Same results, no changes. He finished the kindergarten year with compliments from every teacher that worked with him that he was one of the sweetest most gentle people they had ever worked with.